This weekend we went to my parents' home to help them as they begin to move out of their house of 43 years into a smaller, more convenient house. They have already bought a new house and their current house is only being put on the market this weekend, but my thinking was that, with my parent's health being not great, we would help them move a lot of things, to help them do things that they simply cannot do for themselves. If nothing else, we could start on 43 years of accumulation.
It's never that easy, though. I woke up at 6am this morning wide awake, ready to get to work. Before they arose I started pulling off of the shelves many of their decorative cups and some of the 'special' dinnerware that only gets used a few times a year. I thought I was trying to help, but I was being presumptive. My parents, especially my father, kept explaining that 'it will get done', though nothing had been done and it seemed in my eyes that he was engaging in magical thinking. After some arguing we finally figured out how to co-exist. It's still their house, and I have to realize that it's still their leadership that will get them through this. Long after we go home, they still feel responsible for this move and are not willing to give that up, yet.
The Bible continually speaks about the necessity to honor and obey parents. And this seems to be a very real thing even when the parents no longer are fully capable of being the initiators as they once were. I screwed up in not letting them go their own pace; I did not honor them fully by trying to make my plans for how they were to move more important than what they wanted.
There will come a day when my children will have to take over some of my responsibilities for living. I do hope that I am more willing to let this happen than my parents, but I doubt it. I'm just as stubborn as they are, and as I my children get older I see more and more of my stubborn self in them. Maybe they will be living on Mars by that point and we won't have to argue about these things...but even so, as long as I have my parents I need to do a better job honoring their wishes...even when they probably are not right.
